In the beginning....

In the beginning there was Meredith....

I grew up an army brat, moving all over the world so to speak. My first language was some invention of my own, being a mixture of English and German, and only my mother could discern what I was saying. After moving back to the city of Indianapolis, I grew up to be an average teenager, I thought. I worked, went to school, learned to drive did all the teenage things I was supposed to. Then my mother lost her eyesight but evidently it had been going on for years and the doctors never caught it. She was 35 when it was found. I became the strong one and got her retrained and back on her feet through government agencies. I then started my own family and moved on my merry way thinking all was well. Three children later and a divorce I found myself leaning on my mother for help at 23. Two years later I received my wake up call when I got a double whammy. I was diagnosed with Cervical Cancer and they found the same eye problem in me that my mother has, Retinal Cone Dystrophy. As the years progressed they submitted me for various procedures to rectify the cancer to no avail. My eyesight wasn't bad enough for aid in that arena until much later. At the age of 29 I remarried and much to the suprise of me and the doctors I got pregnant for a fourth time. My Cancer had gone into remission but I had had so much trauma to my reproductive system I was not ovulating, so the doctors thought. The pregnancy was terrible, I was monitored and attached to every machine I could think of. My daughter is perfect though so I can Thank whatever god was looking out for me and her. The pregnancy did bring my cancer out of remission and a year after she was born I had a hysterectomy and they discovered I had Uterian cancer also. After all of that I returned to college and am now 2 classes away from my Bachelor's degree. During this whole time I have dealt with the decline of my eyesight. I am now legally visually impaired and carry a white cane (which scares the toughest man alive evidently). I gave it a name since it is my constant companion. It's name is Charlie, though at times I think Moses would be better since it seems it could part the biggest sea of people known to man. Life has never been so difficult as now. Even with my college life behind me, it seems I have to prove my worth to the world because I cannot see it the same as everyone else. Somehow people get the conception that since I cannot see, I have forgotten how to use my mind and how to interact with society. My life long goal was to work internationally and travel the world. The fates have taken my eyesight but I still believe that there is a purpose for me in the international world. I am just tired of not being taken seriously and thought of as ignorant of the world.